My Little Life...

New blog address

2009-01-04T12:48:00.002-07:00

As all of you know who are here, my blog address is "newadventures08". At the prompting of a friend, I think I should change the title. Since I only got recommendations from one friend (thanks, Jess!) I'll just have to come up with something on my own. I did like some of Jessica's suggestions, but they just didn't quite seem right - except for cindycindybobindy. ;-)

So, change the address in all your favorites to "www.writeoutoftheblue.blogspot.com".

I'll see you all there!

January 4

2009-01-04T12:45:00.003-07:00

So, the new year has come and I feel, remarkably, slightly prepared for it! I know the things I didn't get done last year that I'd like to tackle this year. I know the personal issues I need to keep working on. I know the direction my life is going. Seems pretty good!

I start this new year very thankful for my life, for so many things about my life. I am exceedingly thankful for my parents, how they raised me, the life the showed me was possible. I am thankful for my husband - he is precious to me and I adore him! I am thankful for my sisters, all of whom I love and miss whenever they are away.

I could go on and on, but I won't. I'll just keep making little lists every now and then.

Happy new year, everyone!

Aaah...

2008-12-30T08:12:00.002-07:00

I must say I am relieved that the holidays are over. Even though everything I did was quite lovely, it will be equally as nice to get back to my routine. Perhaps a more accurate statement is that it will be very nice to discover and maintain a routine for at least the first few months of this new year. I'm reading a book on simplifying your life and am going to make a life map - writing down all that I do, the things I don't get done, and things I wish I had time for. I'll then prioritize them according to what I actually do. How do those 2 things stack up against each other, where do I need to make changes, and how can they be accomplished? We'll see if it helps. I have many more minutes in a day in which I could be productive, and I have lots of stuff I'd like to do that will be fun and be good for me! I'll give it a try.

P.S. I think I've just about got pie crust figured out even in this dry climate of ours. My last few crusts have held together and been wonderfully flaky. Yeah! A small victory.

New blog title?

2008-12-26T21:33:00.001-07:00

All right, everyone. I guess I might as well ask since I can't seem to think of something clever on my own. I think I need a new blog url as my adventures aren't really new anymore, and it isn't 08. Any great ideas? I have a few OK ones, but nothing wonderful, so post your comments, and I'll see if something catches my eye. The one that would be most intuitive for me is already taken, so I'll leave it in your capable hands. xo!

Christmas Day

2008-12-25T10:11:00.003-07:00

I rose to join the glorious morn

whose calm and splendor would adorn

the virgin mother's infant born

this blessed dawn of Christmas day.

I pray one day my heart will see

the light of God's eternity,

and know that Jesus died for me.

Now close my eyes, so I may rise,

as blessed dawn of Christmas day.

Christmas day has come and is almost gone. Another year's worth of love, fun, friendship, food, gifts, gatherings, and joy has passed over the threshold to my heart. I am full of love. I am full of joy and thankfulness for my life - the peace in which I am blessed to live, the family I have, the husband I adore. Christmas day for me is about faith, peace and quiet, family, tenderness and laughter. I close my eyes thankful for another day spent in the midst of those things.

Christmas Eve

2008-12-24T23:09:00.002-07:00

The tree's lights are lit, the star is placed, the gifts are arranged. Candlelight service was attended and enjoyed. Cranberry nut tarts have been eaten, a lovely bottle of wine savored. A quiet evening with my beloved. Time for bed. Time to dream. Time to fall asleep thinking of a tiny babe, wrapped in swaddling clothes, adored by mother, father, shepherds. This baby boy born into the most humble of circumstances, yet his birth heralded by a host of angels. What excitement must have filled heaven, to transcend an immeasurable distance and be demonstrated on earth! And what an incredible gift to us...the reason for all those beautifully wrapped presents under the tree. I go to sleep tired, happy, content, knowing full well how well I am loved by family, husband, friends, and most of all - my heavenly Father. I pray this same peace and knowledge for all in my life. Goodnight.

Sunny day

2008-12-22T12:39:00.002-07:00

I just read several friends' blogs and talked to a friend on the phone. I am once again reminded of how blessed I am by the great friends I have and what talented, wonderful women they are. These lovely women pray for me, love me despite my often complaining spirit, accept me for who I am yet encourage me to ever better myself, give me great advice, walk through life's ups and downs with me. I am THANKFUL for them!

I am having a joyous day at home doing some laundry, wrapping my first Christmas present (which was promptly presented under our as of last night erected and decorated tree - very simple and lovely this year!), thinking about a sweater I'm going to make, listening to Christmas music, and waiting for my honey to get home so we can go shopping. What I thought might be a stressful day has turned out to be lovely, full of sun, music and small tasks accomplished.

Today is one of those days in which I acutely feel the goodness of God, his small mercies and the gifts with which he fills our days. His love for me is so personal and intentional. How he desires to lavish me with peace and joy if I will but stop long enough and put aside my petty (and significant) worries, put them into His much more capable hands, and look for the good that has come, and is coming, my way. The small wonders that fill my days are the ones that keep me close to Him, keep me trusting Him, and keep me so aware of His care for me. I am grateful.

Counting down

2008-12-22T09:17:00.003-07:00

Well, only 3 more days to Christmas, my cold is slightly better today (I got some good sleep), I survived my busy but fun weekend, and now on to business! Today we're going to hammer out some Christmas shopping although, frankly, I don't have to do my family's stuff until after Christmas as we're having a late celebration. A bit of a reprieve. ;-)

I'm working to keep my focus on God, on what this time of year should be about. Why am I buying these presents? What do they represent? It is an excellent exercise of mind and will to fight against the crazy commercialism that has all but overwhelmed Christmastime in America. But I think today will be fun, to be out in the sunshine, listening to the Christmas music, being in the throng of people, looking for just the right thing that communicates that I really do love this person.

By the way, I made these delicious rugelach fingers from Martha Stewart's Christmas cookbook. They aren't the most beautiful Christmas cookie ever, but are they ever delicious! Cream cheese, butter and flour crusts filled with chocolate, cherries, walnuts and sugar. Oh, yummy! Fun to have goodies around.

Life saver

2008-12-19T10:44:00.002-07:00

So, now I have a cold and am feeling quite worn out, but I still have these things I've not only committed to do, but want to do...like help cook for a friend's big Christmas open house party and make Christmas cookies for a get together tonight. My time is slipping by, my energy diminishing even more quickly. And what do I discover? My local grocery store will deliver my groceries to me for $10.00! Is it worth $10.00 to not have to wander around the store, load and unload my groceries on a very busy weekend when I'm already coughing every time I walk up the stairs? Why, you bet!!

What a wonderful feeling to have those lovely groceries delivered right to my front door by a friendly man. Not only was my order perfect, but they gave me all the right discounts. Am I a happy camper!

Now all I have to do is cook, and for all of you who know me, that's my very favorite part! Yeah for me! ;-)

Early morning

2008-12-16T06:12:00.010-07:00

6:00 a.m. and I'm awake for no good reason. After writing this I'm going to go back to bed and try reading myself to sleep. I do have an awful lot on my mind, but no more than anyone else this time of year, of that I would bet. I could make a boring list of everything on my mental plate, but I think I'll skip that. Instead, I'll write just a small observation about my trip to the mountains this weekend - something that will bring me great joy throughout this Christmas season.

I was driving over Hoosier Pass (very curvy, hairpin turns, amazing views!) south from Breckenridge and then across South Park (a strange bowl of land that a million years ago was a lake). Christmas music was filling my car and "Oh, Tannenbaum" came on. Such a strange song about a tree, ever-green, and lovely. I was reminded of the many symbols that fill our Christmas celebrations and how many of their meanings have been lost to public knowledge. Here's just one.

The Christmas tree, the evergreen, was first used by pagans in celebration of the winter solstice as a reminder that winter would indeed come to an end. For that, I think we're all thankful. I think it can be a symbol of even greater significance to me at Christmastime - the everlasting life of Christ, whose birth is my entire reason for celebration. What a joyous reminder to me as I drove through those tree-covered mountains, evergreens filling my view.

No matter how hectic I get, no matter what I have going on at Christmas, I would like to keep that reminder in the forefront of my mind. Christmas for me isn't about presents, carols, or beautiful wreaths - it is about celebrating the greatest birthday the world will ever know - the birthday that was perhaps the most humble. Born in a stable, surrounded by animals, no one to tend to the young mother but a single husband, straw for his bed. And yet he is my King, and my Savior. Amazing!

Order...

2008-12-10T08:10:00.002-07:00

I'm trying this new thing where I have at least one day a week where I don't leave the house. (Have I said this already...?) This is going to help me keep up with my housework and, hopefully, get going on some projects. Today is my stay at home day. I hope to do some kitchen cleaning, work on a sewing project, and work on some miscellaneous piles. Sounds stimulating, huh?

There is one problem with this new idea - I have so many lovely friends! I'm going to have to practice saying "no" to them. I'm going to actually stand in front of the mirror and say, "No, I can't do that," "I'm sorry, that time won't work for me." Aaaaaah!! Seems so difficult! I love being with people.

But I'm telling you, I have a lot of projects in mind: clean out the basement, sew some clothes, cull out my fabric, hang pictures, fill some photo albums, design and sew a quilt, etc. That all takes time! Maybe I need two days?

Monday, Monday

2008-12-08T21:32:00.002-07:00

Greetings to cyberspace! A lovely day was had by all here. I spent time with my sister and nephews, played with one, put another to sleep - both equally rewarding! I had a fun evening with old and new friends...enjoyed more snow falling...did some relaxing...finished knitting a hat for my nephew...processed some holiday issues with my hubby. Now it's 9:30 and time for bed...at least for this old lady!

The bed calls...I'll answer with a good book in hand, and my kitty next to me on my pillow. Nighty-night.

Help!

2008-12-02T23:30:00.002-07:00

Seasonal affective disorder kicking into high gear, resulting in pre-holiday stress. So much to do, so much to think about. Feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. Can't get my house neat, can't seem to keep up with it. Haven't exercised in months. Spending too much time doing ... what?!

Ok, deep breath, relax. Nothing is falling apart, husband is happy, friends are holding me up, God is still good! Heart rate slowing, feeling a little better. Tomorrow is a "work at home" day which is a good and lovely thing.

Whoa! It's 11:30 at night?! Going straight to bed! Goodnight all.....

See saw

2008-12-01T08:51:00.003-07:00

Oh, the small pleasures of life! And the fun we can (hopefully) make of ourselves!

Jane Austen has been in the news, in the movies, and in the book reviews more often than not over the past few years. The resurgence of her works has been fun to observe. Ashamedly, I had never read one of her books - excerpts, yes, in some of my literature classes at university, but never a complete work. A change of the tide was about to occur. A few weeks ago, a friend invited me to a lecture entitled, "Jane Austen for Smarties." (Get it? A play on the ...for Dummies books.) The lecture was given by the author of the recently published Jane Austen for Dummies, Joan Klingel Ray, and was indeed an entertaining and informative afternoon. Afterward, Sue and I were talking, and I confessed to being one of the "Jane Austen smarty-pants" to whom the author referred - those who have seen the movies but never read the books. Sue was rather surprised at my confession, and I was spurred on to do some exploration myself of an Austen book.

The quickest to come by at our wonderful library (ppld.org if you want to check it out!) was Pride and Prejudice, and so I began my Jane Austen education in earnest. I anticipated enjoying the book, as so many around me gave testimony to their joy in its reading. I must confess, though, that the beginning was, for me, rather ignominious. I was neither moved nor intrigued by the language of the book, and the plot, being known to me, served as little enticement. I said as much to some friends. I found, however, that as I progressed in my reading, the words themselves began to draw me "further up and further in" (C.S. Lewis, The Last Battle). Austen was working her magic on me...

Result: my mind has been changed - yes, I am an intellectual see saw (teeter totter, if you'd rather)! My conclusion is this: Jane Austen does, indeed, deserve the praise she receives. Despite knowing rather intimately the progression of the plot, despite being aware of the critical reasons for and against the book, despite the sometimes (to our modern ears) over-written prose, I was drawn into Pride and Prejudice like a fish to a lure, and enjoyed every minute of it (except, perhaps, her, albeit period-justified, overuse of commas). The characters, language, and unfolding of the plot gave me great joy and actual out-loud giggles. Her use of just those things was quite delightful and fulfilled just as I had hoped. Too many words, too much dialogue - pah! Quite the opposite if one is willing to go on the ride and enjoy the play being acted out on the page.

Try it for yourself if you haven't - I think you'll be as surprised and delighted as I was!

Perfect Saturday?

2008-11-29T15:13:00.003-07:00

So Tim is off skiing with my dad and brother, and I was all alone today. A wonderful, quiet day. The perfect, post-holiday, feel like being alone, have a project to work on Saturday. I had a simple bowl of cereal for breakfast, did laundry this morning, had (delicious) Thanksgiving leftovers for lunch, finished knitting a hat and scarf for my niece this afternoon, and was just settling down for an afternoon movie when I though about what I might do for dinner. Should I go out and get something, and run a few errands while I'm at it? Sure don't feel like leaving the house...

Upon contemplation of dinner, I remembered pizza coupons I have. Or I could go out - I sometimes like to do that when Tim is out of town. But what did I discover in the freezer that will make this day perfect? Frozen hot wings and individual-size California Pizza Kitchen pizza! Could there be a more perfect end to this perfect day? Dinner at home, with a quiet movie, the fire going, the cats snuggling.

Wonderful!

So...

2008-11-28T09:28:00.003-07:00

...I was going to take pictures as I made my Thanksgiving meal, but only remembered to do it for the pie and then the very start of the green beans. After that it totally slipped my mind. Understandable, I suppose, as I was cranking out a good part of the dinner. I worked like a whirling dervish, Tim working alongside, and got it all done...and on time! I also managed to leave my camera at my dad's house, so no pictures today.

All that to say that our "family" Thanksgiving was tremendous fun!! We had much more than just my family - Tim's parents, and 6 friends made us a group of 14. The house was loud, chaotic, lovely fun! I hope a good time was had by all. I'm sure some people didn't get talked to as much as others. I'm sure some people wished it were a smaller group. I hope all had fun, though, and could feel the love that was in the house. What a wonderful group of friends and family I have. It was a great Thanksgiving!

Discovery!

2008-11-25T18:56:00.004-07:00

Attention! Muir Glen fire roasted tomatoes are amazing! They are way better than other canned tomatoes. They actually taste of tomato. If you are making pasta sauce, soup, etc. - use these. They are worth the extra 50 cents.

Short but sweet. ;-)

Confused...again

2008-11-25T17:47:00.005-07:00

I subbed at the library again today, and let me tell you, am I confused! I've hardly been called to sub since I quit in February, but the truth is I wouldn't want to be working more than a couple of times a month anyway. That much would be all right, though, and I've only worked 5 or 6 days in 8 months. Granted, I've had to say no several times because I've been sick or already had plans, but I thought I'd be contacted more than I am.

Anywho, if I'm doing it for financial reasons, it is almost pointless. If, however, I am doing it to continue seeing people, just keep my feet in the door, that's a good reason. I started out today thinking I was going to have my name taken off the sub list, but just writing this has reminded me that I do love being there - I love helping the patrons, seeing my old co-workers, feeling a part of the team.

Ok, confusion is over. I'll keep my name on the list, try to say yes more, and just enjoy the times I am there seeing old friends and catching-up with old co-workers. :-)

A new week

2008-11-24T08:46:00.002-07:00

So, my holiday blues have started, but I am determined this year to do all I can to combat them - walk outside, listen to my favorite music, be productive, make holiday goodies. Hopefully all those things will help me combat this unreasonable sadness I feel every year.

And good news! Today is a new day, and the beginning of a new week. It is only 8:30 a.m. and I have already replied to e-mails, made a (reasonable) list of tasks for the week, and showered. A very good start to the day.

My "Insight" playlist is filling the house (a musical history and window to Cindy's heart), the sun is shining, and I am ready to face the new day, the new week. My life is filled with love, with family and friends, with a lovely home, and many other good things. I do not write this to minimize or deny the hard time I have this time of year, but to speak the truth of good things, to remind my heart and my mind that all is well. I need not be completely controlled by my emotions, and that in itself is a good thing!

Quantum of Solace

2008-11-22T21:56:00.003-07:00

Oh, I was sitting in my living room this afternoon, the lovely sun streaming in, knitting a hat for my very cute, red-headed niece, watching a TV show on holiday treats. A wave of sadness hit me the first of this holiday season. Yes, I am one of those people who always gets the holiday blues, and this year seems like it will be no exception. For the first time ever, however, I think I am figuring out that it has to do with the weather and the very short days through the end of December. Good news - there are ways to combat this sadness, so I will try them and see if they make much of a difference. Lucky for me - one of the methods is exercise outside, and that fits right in with my battle plan for a healthier me. A two for one benefit! Yeah!

On an aside, I went to see "Quantum of Solace" the new James Bond movie to night. Very good, if you like that sort of thing, which I do. Entertaining, moving, great cinematography, etc. A jolly good time, and a fun evening with family. All remains well in my life!

Introspection

2008-11-21T21:42:00.003-07:00

Ever leave a group of people and feel like you just dominated conversation...or were too demonstrative in speaking your opinions...or engaged in something equally awkward and off-putting? I feel like that tonight. I love the people I was hanging out with, and sure don't want to distance any of them. Did I? How will I know without asking? That just feels too scary and awkward.

So, the question of the day is this: How does one work to change a potentially negative character trait? How do I even remember to work on this? Talking too much and being loud and boisterous has been a part of my personality for so long. I don't want to turn it off - just turn it down! How do I go about it? Hang a sign on my door reminding me each time I leave the house to "talk less" or "be gentler in your opinions"? I'm sure that would be an effective method, but probably not the best in terms of maintaining self-esteem, etc.

So there it is. And as Kathleen (Meg Ryan) says in "You've Got Mail": I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So goodnight, dear void.

Mystery nephew

2008-11-21T16:48:00.003-07:00

I have been informed, and concur, that I have been terribly remiss in putting up at least one picture of my new nephew - Ethan. He was born about 4 weeks ago, and so far is giving his mom and dad quite a bit of trouble - constipation, upset stomach, lots of screaming and crying. This does not, however, seem to have deterred them from loving him! Imagine that!! So, here's my first picture of Ethan. I'll work at getting some more up as he is, indeed, almost as cute as his older brother, Zachary.

Into battle

2008-11-21T08:40:00.003-07:00

Once more unto the breach, dear friends... (Shakespeare, Henry V)

So I have once again decided it is time to get fitter and lose some weight. My friends are rolling their eyes, knowing how often I've said this and knowing I've only accomplished it a few times. Don't get me wrong - I never say it lightly, I never plan to spend a year on my ass, doing not much at all, ignoring most rules of good nutrition. So here I go, once more unto the breach, into battle against my own poor self-control and the temptations of the refrigerator. "Set goals," some people say, or, "Just eliminate bad stuff from your cupboards." All admirable strategies, none of which have worked for me. I'll just do it my own way, hoping and praying (literally) to become a fitter, healthier woman.

To all those who join me in this endeavor, "Be strong, and of good courage!" It is a fine balance between being happy with ourselves just the way we are, and struggling with either the way the world says we should be or our own desires to change. I do not want to become someone who worries much at all about the way I look. I would like to be able to go for a hike without huffing and puffing, live with less body pain, and shop in a regular store.

So I guess I do have goals. I'll work toward them with that in mind - my own satisfaction and health. Onward and upward!

Some of my favorite things

2008-11-18T08:00:00.004-07:00

clean sheets

great deals on new clothes

delicious leftovers

quiet evenings with Tim

a ladies' potluck

good books

planning a party

my kitties

music that moves me

Sunday evening

2008-11-16T18:39:00.004-07:00

I am moved by the depth hidden within my friends.

I suppose we all walk through life thinking we are extraordinary in one way or another. And truth be told - we are all extraordinary. But I am not the only poet I know. I am not the only..... And where I excel and another struggles, the opposite is also true - I struggle, you excel. I love the connection of differences, the wondrous fitting together of that this creates. Let us live our lives allowing one another to mesh, to mold, to puzzle.

What am I trying to say? Of that, I'm not exactly clear. I do know that I am moved by my many friends' blogs, by what they share, the pictures they take, the songs they write, the stories they tell. I am touched by the human-ness within all of them. The beauty, the joy, the suffering - all that has led us each to this point. One's childhood was filled with pain and sorrow. Another had the childhood of a gentle novel. This woman is just now discovering her power as an adult. And this one is finding that she can indeed afford to be vulnerable. I am strong; I am weak. You are strong; you are weak. We are all the same. We are all so very different.

I am moved by the depth hidden within my friends.

Pretty little things

2008-11-13T09:01:00.010-07:00

There was this cute little town near Wilmington, Vermont - Bennington. Full of art guilds, hand-crafted, lovely things, fun pubs, etc. Truth be told, I spent a very hectic and harried morning in Bennington, driving in circles, to and fro, trying to find various specific sights - Robert Frost's homestead, a huge obelisk, etc. Didn't seem like it would be much of a challenge in such a small town, but it sure was! Ended up being very rushed, and late picking-up Tim in a town 30 miles away.

But I ended up with two lovely items, and they will make me very happy! I love buying local pottery as my souvenir, so I did just that... I had to have them shipped - no room in my densely packed suitcase. :-) Two more pretty pieces of pottery to add to my collection from Dearborn, Michigan; Acadia, Maine; Fayetteville, Arkansas; San Diego, California; Amman, Jordan...

Abrupt change of subject: I am feeling so blessed right now! I have at least 5 friends who are going through very serious trials - and here I sit, in my life of ease. Oh, I know it is a season, and hard times come and go. Mine have passed for now, and for that I'm grateful. More hard times will come. Meanwhile, my thoughts and prayers are being lifted up for these loved ones who are hurting. May their time of peace come quickly.

My buddy

2008-11-09T19:18:00.004-07:00

Can you believe these beautiful, blue eyes? This is what I get to look into each time I spend time with my precious nephew Zachary. I have 5 other nieces and nephews who live far away from me, so I am even more thankful to have 2 living here in the same city. I think I'm in love!!

Not quite right

2008-11-09T19:15:00.004-07:00

Sometimes I make a meal and it is just wonderful. Usually, if I'm honest. I'm a pretty good cook according to the people I feed. I can bake yummy stuff, too. Making it pretty isn't my forte. Ok, so this isn't as big a disaster as it looks. This monster is made up of all those bits that didn't want to come out of the cake pan - something for Tim to nibble on over the next week. The cake I actually served was much prettier - but it still wouldn't win any contests!

Complications

2008-11-07T13:04:00.003-07:00

I was talking recently with a friend about how complicated life can be - all the decisions we have to make, how we spend or time, negotiating things with spouses, keeping our hearts open and tender while not being constantly wounded by life...

It does all sometimes seem like just about too much! It is (by "it" I mean life, handling it, the day to day stuff) - it is made much easier by lovely relationships. I have a great marriage, great, fun friends, a relationship with God that sustains me (rather than a religion that boxes me in), a beautiful place to live, etc., an awful lot of freedom in my personal life.

It is those relationships, though, that are the outriggers on my canoe. They help keep me even-keeled in the water of life. I am thankful for them. I know I often neglect some of my relationships (you know who you are...bear with me?). I just can't keep up with all of them, all of the time. That is a consequence of moving so much in my life. But they all are the padding around me, helping protect me from getting too banged-up and bruised on this Mr. Toad's Wild Ride of life. Yeah for friends!

Where have I been?

2008-11-06T09:55:00.003-07:00

Seems like the last several days have just flown by! I know, I say that a lot. Well, what have I been doing? Sending pictures of my daily life to a "pen pal", volunteering at our local elementary school's book fair, going to the zoo with my 2 nephews and sister, trying to find a new pair of red shoes (red's a neutral, you know!), keeping up with my house a little better, taking care of my sick husband.

Oh, that's why I haven't written much lately!

And now I'm off to do some laundry, sort through clothes I don't need/want anymore, get ready for Bible study, load the dishwasher, and call a friend. Whew! Maybe I'll write more this weekend. Sure is a good thing I don't have a job - I don't think I have time for one.

In all seriousness, the whole job thing is weighing on me a little heavier lately. Tim and I are getting short on money, and it looks like we might not be selling our current renovation project in time to refill our bank account. Should I be working? Is what I contribute in the house enough (eating out less because I cook, have the energy to work at saving money, etc.)? I'm not sure. I definitely don't want to go back to work, but I think I need to ask those questions of Tim and make sure we're on the same page. I'll let you know what we decide!

Meanwhile, back to those housefrau tasks.

On a migraine day

2008-10-30T16:31:00.020-06:00

The rotation of the Earth,

proved on my living room hearth -

that spot of sun that moves from east to west

on days of work and days of rest.

Perpetual motion played out in my home

while through the black of space we roam.

Not on paths of undetermined end,

although we cannot see 'round the bend,

but on a road that's smooth and true,

led by a God who always follows through.

He touched this Earth and caused it to begin

its revolution and its spin,

knowing each of us would travel on its surface

living, trying to know our purpose.

Perpetual motion? Yes.

But in God we find perpetual rest.

Vemont pics are up!

2008-10-29T21:18:00.005-06:00

Finally, I put some pictures of our Vermont trip. I won't write anything for a few days, I don't think. I put up several posts, so scroll down this page to see them all.

Vermont was, indeed, as picturesque as people say. The leaves got prettier each day, the old farms and stone fences were indeed worth seeing, it was all very calming and beautiful. I'll spare you my many words, though, and just give you the pictures. Quick synopsis of

what we did: rode bikes, ate, hiked, relaxed in the yard, ate again, fed the cows, picked apples, ate (getting the picture?), read, had a snack, then napped! It was lovely!!

Enjoy these pictures. Boston will be up in a few days.

Oh, here's one more of my honey and his dad as we ride bikes. :-0 Isn't he cute? (The younger guy on the right, that is...)

A farm market

2008-10-29T21:14:00.007-06:00

Shearer Hill Farm

2008-10-29T19:02:00.022-06:00

Bill and Pati were fantastic hosts. If you're ever on your way to southern Vermont, their B&B was a great, relaxing, beautiful place to stay. Give them a call!

Here's the "sugar shack" of this real working farm, where they grow many of their own fruits and vegetables, and make their own maple syrup. Delicious!

I guess these buckets tell a small part of the story of how much work harvesting maple sap, then making it into syrup is.

Old stone fences - so evocative of Robert Frost and the life he wrote about.

A lake we found while wandering

2008-10-29T18:57:00.014-06:00

Here comes fall

2008-10-29T18:48:00.008-06:00

The road less travelled

2008-10-29T17:47:00.012-06:00

Shiny floor

2008-10-28T11:05:00.008-06:00

Yeah! I found my living room yesterday! I can see the floor - it is even swept. The couch is clean enough to sit on. The trash is emptied. The books are picked up. OK, so I still need to vacuum the rugs and dust, but there it is - a room clean enough to relax in. That makes me happy. Oh, and I did almost all the laundry...and even put it away. ;-)

It has been a good 1 1/2 days working in my house. I can see progress, can see keeping it this way for a good long while. Somehow trips out of town derail me from keeping my house clean. Not sure why that is, and haven't ever sat down to figure it out.

My big goal for this fall? Get the house clean, keep it clean, then start going through all those boxes sitting in the basement. I had a good talk with a friend today who gave me some good ideas and wonderful encouragement. Thanks, Julie!

It feels so good to make progress on a project, to see tasks completed and be able to cross them off the running list I keep. Ethan's hat is finished, Zachary's is almost done, I have a sweater sitting to finish, but that's a good thing. And what a perfect time to finish some things, and start others. Fall and winter will be the perfect season to go through those boxes with the cool temperatures outside, the warmth inside, the golden sunshine that my house collects like a box of treasures. Tea, bagel in the morning, hit the chores, get going on those boxes, and by the afternoon, I will have accomplished enough to sit, knit and enjoy a favorite episode of M*A*S*H or something like that.

Life is good, ain't it?

For my friends who are struggling with stuff, I'm praying for you...that you can experience some peace and lovely quiet, too. May my peace be contagious and cross the miles to your hearts.

Crazy...

2008-10-27T15:21:00.002-06:00

...that's what last week was! I took care of Zachary for 2 days, helped my sister with 2, and then Friday was spent with some wonderful lady friends. ;-) A good week, but totally exhausting. I'm processing the whole baby/no baby thing, and that's good. Meanwhile, my house seemed to explode even though I was hardly here (because I was hardly here?).

What does this week hold? Very little...except catching-up on my house. That means laundry, dishes, sweeping, dusting, etc. I'll get a lot done, and hopefully some praying while I do it. I want to spend more time on my relationship with my God! He sustains me and loves me; I want to seek him out.

I know, still no pictures of Boston...maybe later this week! Back to my full laundry baskets for now.

Whoa!

2008-10-20T15:13:00.005-06:00

How fast does time pass? I mean to tell you, it seems like I've been home just a few days, but tonight it will have been a week. I still haven't unpacked. I have called a lot of my friends and even seen some of them. I also made it to the grocery store. I keep saying I'll download my pictures, and maybe I'll get that today.

But, frankly, I have bigger fish to fry.

My sister and her husband (not the ones in Jordan) are about to have their second baby. They will be going to Denver tomorrow morning, so I'll be taking care of my nephew Zachary for two days. I'm excited about this time with him, but a little nervous too. I must confess that, even though I LOVE spending time with this little guy, being alone with him often brings on the tears. Being alone with him feels too close to what I want - a child of my own! Although I can say with full confidence, and honestly believe, that God is in charge of my life, the timing of events, etc., I still mourn not having a kid. Maybe someday this will work out...

Meanwhile, I've recruited friends to come be with me - just to hang out, play, etc. Tim will come over some, too, and that will be lots of fun.

So, just be patient. I'll get some pics of Vermont and Boston, but not until after I spend my couple of days with little Zachary. (Little? He ways almost 30 lbs.!)

Oh, by the way - I have a name now. He calls me "Nini." I just about die each time I hear it!!! Could I love him more? I certainly doubt it. I think the appropriate phrase is, "apple of my eye!"

Home!

2008-10-14T20:16:00.004-06:00

tired

had lots of fun

need to unpack

have about 10 friends to call

fridge is empty

laundry needs to be done

bed still isn't made

pictures to be printed

glad to be home

kitties are even gladder we're home :-)

pics will be up soon

goodnight

On my way out

2008-10-05T10:12:00.003-06:00

Well, our vacation to Vermont has finally arrived. We leave tomorrow early morning. I sure hope this week can be restful for me, and especially for Tim who is totally worn out. I'm looking forward to long walks in the leaves with my hubby, quiet afternoons reading outside, evenings playing games, and seeing Boston for the first time. Of course, the autumn display of leaves in Vermont is supposed to be amazing, so you all know I'll love that! I'll try to restrain myself and not load too many pictures when I get home. :-)

I've been having a lot of bad dreams lately, so I hope this can be a week of blank sleep, long sleep, and really rejuvenating time. I'm desirous of lots of quite - which I might have to accomplish by getting out of the B&B and going on walks, etc. I'll just capture my own time as I can. So quiet, time outside, walks, reading, beautiful leaves. Couldn't ask for a better vacation, really. Better go pack...

Morning

2008-10-03T08:11:00.003-06:00

I had a terrible dream last night. I was back working at the library, and was visiting retirement homes doing PR. I saw Tim's grandfather there - as if I'd forgotten that he was till alive. A terrible feeling, but a wonderful reunion. Can't really explain how awful that felt, but it sure did. I've awakened feeling down, a little shaken.

I greatly dislike it when I have dreams that are hard to leave behind, that follow me through my morning. At least this one wasn't about my mom - those are the worst. I'll try to just get busy early and get on with my day. AJ has been gone for 13 years this December, so I don't need to worry about finding him somewhere unexpected! We still miss him; I still miss my mom. All those feelings are real. What to do with them today? I'll put them in my pocket and try to scatter them as I walk along the day's path.

Wardrobe

2008-10-01T16:18:00.003-06:00

I really have very little going on. I have no deep thoughts rumbling around in my head. (Ok, that's not true, but I'm not ready to share them just yet....) I'm just going about my days, getting ready for a trip to Vermont to see the leaves, figuring out how to spend my fall. I did do one exciting thing today - I went shopping. :-) I actually greatly dislike shopping for clothes. You see, I am a little chubby and there just isn't that much out there for us bigger girls that is cute, stylish, actually fits, that I can afford. My clothing budget isn't very big, so I have to choose wisely.

I did get a few things today, and those basics I bought have inspired me to minimized my wardrobe. Even though I don't have lots to spend on clothes, I have lots of clothes!! I keep them too long - even after they don't fit, they have a stain, or a snag here and there. Perhaps when I get back from my trip I will take a morning or two and try on all those clothes. I'll keep just the ones I really like, the ones that make up outfits (as opposed to the items that go with nothing in the closet!), the items that make me really happy. I'd rather have a few things I love than this closet full of clothes that frustrates me! I'm not quite ready for "What Not to Wear" to come by, but I think I can take their ideas and make them work for me.

Yahoo, I'll give it a go! That's my exciting news for this week. :-)

Daily life

2008-09-25T22:10:00.002-06:00

Not much going on over here, which I why I haven't written much this week. My days have been lovely and quiet. Well, ok, we had a slight family crisis Wednesday, but other than that not much has been going on. I'm enjoying watching fall come. (I love the crisp, cold air that has filled my bedroom by the time I go to sleep.) I'm very much looking forward to a long, quiet hike this weekend up at Twin Lakes. I'm trying to keep up with the housework, and get some projects done (started?). Other than that, life is very quiet.

I've been thinking a lot about my friends and how much they mean to me. I know I'm terrible at keeping up with the ones who are far away. Well, if you're reading this, know I think of you much more often than I am in touch with you. So, thanks for loving me despite my faults!

Good news!

2008-09-22T10:09:00.011-06:00

Good news! My old kittie, Charlie (16 years old), had to go to the vet today for his yearly shots. Poor Charlie has started to really show his age. He doesn't always land on his feet, he wobbles around when he walks, he wakes up confused and scared in the middle of the night (senility, says the doc). The vet was happy, though, at how healthy Charlie is...and that made me happy!

Charlie loves to sit in front of the fire. He's happy winter is on its way! Good thing we have this screen - otherwise, he'd try to sit right next to those toasty flames! ;-)

I'm off to run errands; I'm sure Charlie is off to find a warm, comfy place to nap for the rest of the day! So exhausting going to the vet!

Right before my eyes

2008-09-21T19:15:00.021-06:00

Fall is my favorite season, and here are just a few reasons why...

...the beautiful sky - that crazy color of blue

...the amazing trees, each one unique, even the colorful shades of brown

...the cold that is hidden within every breeze

I particularly love the aspen trees as they change, here in Colorado. It is quite a sight to see. The evergreens, of course, remain steadfast in their color, shifting only the slightest bit from spring to summer, fall to winter.

The aspens - now they are another story. In the spring, they are the lightest green, almost iridescent. Summer brings them into a deeper color. Fall brings out their glory, just before they rest for winter.

I love the symbiosis they have with the rest of the forest. Seeing their brilliance juxtaposed against their own white trunks dotted with black, the green of the spruce and pine, the rocks, even the underbrush is stunning. Words can't really describe it.

When you're standing in a grove of golden aspen, even the light is different. That cerulean blue sky is quickened to its brightest against the foil of these leaves. And the golden air that surrounds me makes me feel like a child wandering in some fairy land. Words escape me. I want it never to end...

As I walk through the forest, I see that even the underbrush has put on its finest, arraying itself in all the colors in its wardrobe. Scrub oak turns copper, wild strawberry leaves take on the color of their fruit, pink granite rocks peek out from under fallen leaves and bracken. Wondrous!

Anchor

2008-09-17T21:15:00.007-06:00

Come walk the trail with me as we make our way toward sunset.

See those distant hills?

They mark our time as the sun creeps below the horizon.

Sneeky, isn't it, how the days pass -

this one quickly, that one as slowly as a cat's early morning stretch.

I bask in the sun of my life - love, friends, sisters.

Even my daily chores fill my hours with meaning as I prepare a meal to sustain,

clothes in which to work,

a place to lay my head.

Meaning isn't found in what I do, or who I am,

but in why all those are, and who they serve.

As for me and my house,

we will serve the Lord.

No trite phrase, glibly uttered,

but a truth and a commitment wholly felt,

fully believed.

This measures my time, my days, my life, my meaning.

This holds me in my hours, yet lifts me up

toward an eternal hope.

Time to switch

2008-09-15T09:52:00.003-06:00

Have I said that I have this lovely house? I especially like it in the fall. Somehow the light is very different, warmer, more golden. It floods in the windows and just makes everything look so pretty! I will, however, be making a rather strange switch this week or next. Even though I have a beautiful dining room with pretty furniture, dishes, etc., it is a room that doesn't actually get used very often. I seldom have more than 4 people at my table, and yet it is the center-piece of the room - of course!

I also have this very sad, cramped office/craft space. I like to sew, knit, make stationary, bind small journals, quilt.... Right now I'm doing it all in the smallest, coldest, worst lit room in the house! I'm home all day - I'd love to have more space for that kind of thing.

I think I'm going to switch the two! Yes, it will look a little odd to walk into my house and see an office right in front of you, but c'est la vie. I'll give it a go and see how it works. I even have 2 lovely friends who have offered to help, so now's the time! When is change a bad thing - especially stepping out of a convention and trying something out of the box. I'll give it a go...

My garden

2008-09-13T15:28:00.046-06:00

Slowly, very slowly, I worked on planting flowers this summer. I did not get my weeds under control, or my blobs of grass planted, but I will weed more this fall and get to the grass in the spring. I just ran out of energy and good days! Whew! Here's what I've got so far on one side of my front yard...

Every garden needs some sculptural interest...

Who doesn't love echinacea?

Last but not least my rock and thyme combo...

Rain

2008-09-12T07:53:00.002-06:00

The rain patters down in that perfect early morning way, covering each blade of grass, each glistening rock, each blooming flower. The sound of the rain lulls me, tempts me back into bed, into a book, into my journal - something quiet and introspective. I love the rain, I love what it does for the colors of fall, what it does in my heart, calming me, soothing me, bedding down for a season my should-dos, hectic days, scurry here and there mornings. As long as the rain lasts, I will relax, be calm and rested. Lovely!

September 11

2008-09-11T10:25:00.002-06:00

What a day to remember! This is the Kennedy assassination of our generation - we will all remember where we were when it happened. I was in my kitchen, making pancakes with friends, one of whom was to return to France that very day. We watched speechless as those terrible events unfolded.

I'm not exactly a screaming patriot. I'm not someone who will defend the U.S. even when she's wrong. I can even understand, to a certain extent, why those terrorists did what they did. But I thank God for the protection our country has had, the peace we've experienced for so many years, for the safety in which we live our lives.

As another election approaches, I know who I'll vote for. I have lots of reasons for this. No matter who is elected, let's each live our lives with integrity, honesty, hard work, and all the things that have made America a safe, powerful, politically free country, the first place refugees of war, oppression, danger come to. Sanctuary for the world. No matter where we're from, who we follow, or what we believe, let's each be a sanctuary of peace and love to all we know.

Happy Birthday...

2008-09-05T08:16:00.004-06:00

...to me! Epiphany last weekend that I am quite self-critical, so this year I am going to only focus on what I did accomplish this year.

took a trip to Jordan and spent lots of time with lovely family there!

sewed beautiful curtains for my sun room

went on several lovely hikes and bike rides

had tons of fun at a family reunion

quit my job

made a couple of new friends

made a giant leap forward in how I trust God

threw a couple of fun parties

did not buy very many new summer clothes :-)

made some progress in my house management

started landscaping my yard

Pretty good list just off the top of my head! Happy birthday to me and all the other September birthdays out there. Make your own list of what you've done this year. It will make you smile!

No pity

2008-09-04T12:40:00.004-06:00

I just have to say that the worst thing about these damn migraines is the way it wears me out emotionally. Not only do I wake up with an idea of what I'd like to get done in a day, and then can't - after these several weeks of frequent painful days, my heart becomes so fragile that the slightest thing sets me crying. Yuck! Despite my lovely friends, my great companions, I feel lonely, falsely abandoned, as if I have no one in the world.

Sidebar: Granted, three of my best friends are many miles away (Julie, Naomi, Kimberly). And...this week I have the additional sadness of having recently said goodbye to some new but deeply felt relationships (Jessica, Tara, Wiwin, Brandi) - being reminded of their distance. I guess I do have some reason to cry today.

But have no pity on me! Life is too short for that kind of nonsense. The truth of the matter is that my pain is a small thing compared to that of so many other people. It doesn't negate it, but certainly puts it in a good perspective. I know this sad self is temporary, that tomorrow I'll wake up and feel much better - physically and emotionally. I'm not writing for pity - I'm writing to vent. Isn't that the purpose of this forum? To be honest and transparent even when what I write and what I want might seem contradictory? (I.e., why write that I'm having lots of migraines unless I do want pity, when pity is not what I want? If pity is not what I want, why write the migraine part? Hm, I have no answer to that...today.)

Anywho, there it is. This is where I am today - feeling sad for not very significant reasons. And writing this for no reason at all, except to put it out there. Take no pity on me, but smile if you read this and it touches you somewhere. Then be encouraged - the sun is shining, fall is coming with its cool days and beautiful colors, and somewhere, even if far away, we're loved. That I know.

Gray day

2008-09-03T08:45:00.003-06:00

I woke up this morning to gray skies, low clouds, and decidedly cooler temperatures. Feels lovely, actually! Fall is coming!

All our company has left, it's back to our usual routine, and that's just fine with me. Oh, I have had a wonderful time, though, with Wiwin - an old friend from Indonesia who was just here visiting for three weeks. We hiked, talked, laughed, shared our hearts, and just had an amazing time. I'd forgotten what it's like relating so closely with someone from my home country! There's something just a little different - brings out the Indonesian in me. :-)

So back to life. Time to clean the kitchen (which has been sadly neglected...again), catch-up on some laundry, housework, mail, etc. I'm looking forward to it, though. September and October are 2 months of non-scheduled time...finally. Days and days with not much going on. Oh, an occasional event here and there, but mostly just time for me to be at home and work on some projects, both big and small. Yes! Feels very good.

On with my day, and this next season, both literally and figuratively in my life. The summer is over, traveling, whirlwind time management is over. On to the calmer, more peaceful pace of autumn. We'll see what that means in a month's time. Meanwhile, the kitchen calls!

Friday

2008-08-29T17:31:00.002-06:00

A new day...wonderful feeling! I had a good day today...

prayed with a friend

had a quick, lovely visit with another from out of town

shopped with a third

had dinner with my best friend - Tim

Tomorrow I head to the mountains for 2 days of hiking and relaxing with 2 lovely ladies. I hope the weather is nice. Other than that, I know we'll have a good time.

Fall is coming, slowly, and I am ready for it - the shorter days, cooler weather, beautiful golden air. It all will be a relief after this hectic, crazy summer. Ah, lovely!

Extraordinary

2008-08-27T17:00:00.005-06:00

Tomorrow is the 12th anniversary of my mother's death. Each year I wonder if I'll still remember the date in 12 months. I guess maybe I'll never forget it. Each year I think about what to do, how to commemorate this. Some years, I do nothing. What does my heart tell me this year? Recite the Jewish prayer of Kaddish? Release some pretty balloons? Plant sunny marigolds? Phone her best friend?

My week has been plagued with migraines, so I haven't had much energy to think, concentrate, mourn. I've been busy with a visiting friend (and having fun). My body and mind are tired. That all makes me miss her more.

Time is so odd the way it smoothes over many rough edges, dulls much pain. Even this loss is lessened, but not eliminated, over time. I can't even really think straight - I feel dull as a wooden spoon; I'm not sure what I want to say here. I do know that this afternoon my heart is heavy and all week tears have been springing from my eyes. My body knows it is time to take a moment and remember, grieve. Here's just a touch of Mom for all of you...

Carolyn Kay North

extraordinary woman

gentle

wise guide

funny

impatient

adventurous

conscientious

loved to laugh

my best friend

Mom

Start over

2008-08-25T08:17:00.002-06:00

A new week begins. Half of me dreads it; half of me looks forward to it. I am worn out by a weekend of migraines, but look forward to a week with not very many commitments. I have discovered over the weekend that I am very self-critical. In a note to my sister, I twice noted tasks I wished I had accomplished, but haven't, and in a not very forgiving tone. I have such high ambitions for things I'd like to accomplish, so many ideas, so many thoughts running through my head, but I just don't (can't?) seem to execute even a small number of them. OK, I get a few things done, but it seems like the majority of my life is in the "failure" column, at least in my own head.

Why am I so critical of myself? Why is it so hard to accept that I just can't get everything done I want? My body, my mind, my time are limited. I can't just go, go, go. All right - I can do more than I do, but not everything. Maybe instead of having a list of things I want to accomplish this week, month, I'll just list what I want to accomplish and work on it without any time constraint, without any idea of when it will get done? That way the ideas get written down, I remember them, I have a place to go to reference what I'd like to do next, but there's no pressure to do these 8 things this month.

I'll try that. We'll see if it helps me get rid of the rather large backpack of criticism I'm carrying around!

Pesta!

2008-08-20T21:55:00.002-06:00

All the former missionaries to Indonesia and their kids who currently live in Colorado Springs gathered tonight to enjoy the company of Wiwin Simson, a wonderful young lady visiting from my hometown of Bandung, Indonesia. I have lots to say, but am VERY tired after cooking all day. I made 5 dishes, 3 of which were hits. :-) Better luck next time. I'll work on perfecting one of the vegie dishes. Anyway, I'm tired and am going to bed, but I am very happy the party was such a success. I reconnected with some people, ate wonderful food, and had a great time! Goodnight for now...

Yesss!!!

2008-08-19T23:38:00.005-06:00

I go to sleep tonight completely satisfied with myself! I have been cooking Indonesian food for quite some time now, and with good success. Tonight, for the first time, I have made one of my favorite Indonesian dishes - a compressed rice dish called "lontong." It previously seemed too complicated, so this is a great achievement for me! Frankly, I'm impressed with myself...and very happy! :-) I will be PROUD to serve it at our Indonesian dinner tonight! More about that tomorrow.

Yeah, Cindy!

Cloudy skies

2008-08-15T10:18:00.002-06:00

I know I'm supposed to be writing more often and just keeping up with my life...it doesn't seem to be happening very well. The days slip by with nothing that seems worthy of writing. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I'm sitting around not doing anything. I have made great progress on my yard, just haven't gotten pictures taken. I've done quite a bit of housework, too, but that hardly seems blog-worthy. Spent some time with my sister and her adorable son yesterday. That was fun, but not too exciting for all of you. Not sure what to be writing about here.

I'll say that I'm very happy to see summer coming to an end and fall approaching. In a month our aspen trees will be turning, and I'll get my sweaters out. I haven't gotten done some of the things I wanted to this summer like exercising and spending time with God, but I've done other things. I'm trying to take my best friend's advice and give myself time to ease back into not working. It's a little confusing how to spend my time, my days. They are very full, but I'm not as focused as I'd like to be. I'll keep working on it. :-)

That's all for now! No amazing insights or updates. Just my little life.

Favorite things

2008-08-07T19:50:00.002-06:00

long slow rains

snuggling with kitties

Indian food

books that captivate me

the smells of lavender and lemon

all the possibilities in my yarn stash

successful shopping with my sister

watching Tim cook

a good movie

Project Runway and Top Chef

beautiful fabric

patient friends

my family

The letting go

2008-08-06T09:34:00.003-06:00

Oh, the letting go of life, the things we hold on to that are dear to us, the things we wish for, pray for, hope for most strongly. It seems such a big part of life to learn how to not cling to these things, how to discern which are benefiting us and which are doing us harm, which are part of the plan and which we are forcing to fit. It is a painful process, one with which we never seem to become totally comfortable, probably because it does cause pain each time we must excise something from our hearts, our lives. But on a day like today, with the bright blue sky, the little birds flitting here and there, the whisper thin clouds floating along, I feel hope mixed with my sadness. All will be well, everything will be all right. I have hope, I have joy despite sorrow, I have peace.

Sweater trouble

2008-08-05T08:58:00.005-06:00

I just can't seem to get this sweater to work out! First I tried it with an additional bright pink yarn. That just overwhelmed the whole look, so I took it apart and did it with just these 3 yarns - the gray, white, and a multi-colored, self-striping yarn. Doesn't look quite right to me. Are the stripes too wide? Does the gray look out of place against the bright colors? What to do? I' m about to take it apart and just set it aside for another day's inspiration.

Other than this sweater issue, life is cruising along quite nicely. I'm having a very busy summer, though. August is here now, and I' m going to try to not over schedule as I did in July. So far it's not working very well. I have something every day this week except Friday. I know that's not exactly a tragedy as almost everything I have scheduled is fun or for my benefit. I'd just like more days with nothing. There's a lot I'd like to do at home. That, of course, is up to me. I'll work on achieving more "empty" days next week. :-)

The yard is coming along...slowly. More pictures of that on the way soon. Cooler weather is soon on it's way, too, which makes me very happy! Yeah autumn!

Summer is passing

2008-07-30T14:38:00.002-06:00

Tomorrow is the last day of July, and I have blessedly little scheduled in August. It seems this has not been a summer of leisure but of appointments, to-dos, travel, and uncompleted tasks. I'm very happy to say I've gotten one sweater almost finished (the knitting is done!), the yard is taking shape, and I've spent some good time with friends. All in all, it's been a good summer, even though it has seemed hectic.

August is going to be a month for me - to get some good, healthy patterns and routines established (eating better, exercising, maintaining my house, getting some more projects done). I'm very much looking forward to it. Nothing major - just taking care of me and mine.

Ah, summer - those hot days when all I want to do is stay cool. Got to keep moving, though. So much to do - so little time. So many lovely hikes, gardens to enjoy, sunsets to watch, picnics to take. All that lovely stuff! Ah, summer!

New start

2008-07-15T16:10:00.006-06:00

Well, July is 1/2 over as of tomorrow, and I'm just now getting started on my big summer project. The house my husband and I recently moved into has nothing growing in the yard except dirt and weeds. Observe the beautiful yard we bought! ;-) Not even very many weeds. I have volunteered to landscape the whole thing. I love to garden - to research what plants will grow here in our short, but somewhat hot summers, what will tolerate the very intense sun, what will do well with very little watering. I made my plan, made a list of plants I wanted, found the best deals and today bought my plants! Very exciting!

All I have left to do is buy soil amendment, work that into the ground, build up my slightly raised beds, move the rocks into place, and then my lovely plants can go into the ground. I sure hope this turns out looking nice. You can be the judge as I make progress.

Hautacam morning

2008-07-14T14:07:00.003-06:00

Tim and I got up at 5:00 a.m. to watch today's stage of the Tour de France live. As usual, it was a wonderful morning! We love doing this - getting up before the sun, first thing making a pot of coffee, and watching the riders work their way up and down some gruesome mountains. There's something very magical and intimate about doing this. We've done it for years and it brings us much joy. Can't really express it!

The Tour is progressing in its usual way with great battles, unexpected stage wins, amazing cooperation between riders, teamwork of an unusual kind, sacrifice, suffering, nobility - all the stuff that makes us cycling fans. On with the show!

Questions

2008-07-13T09:36:00.018-06:00

The little, downtown church my husband and I attend had a women's retreat in the mountains this weekend. It turned out that only 5 of us went, but that allowed us to have really nice, intimate conversation. I enjoyed my time with the ladies, but seem to have returned home with more questions than answers.

What might God be calling me to give up in my life, turn over to him?

Since God encourages us in the Bible to tell him the desires of our hearts, when does one stop praying for that desire and just say, "God, do whatever you want. I will be at peace with that."

How do I work with God to change unhealthy habits and thought processes that seem to be deeply imbedded within me? How do I work on transforming my mind?

How do we really build intimate, authentic, very personal community with each other within the scope of both new and already established relationships, our busy lives, different personalities and priorities? When does this effort go from trying to foster community to forcing the issue?

How much of my spouse's undesirable personality traits (or just plain bad habits) do I try to influence for the better? Am I completely without responsibility for him if we are supposed to be a team, and I believe that God has called me to be his help-mate?

All this stuff is floating around today. I'd better spend some time thinking, praying, studying on some of these questions. I think, too, I'd like to have some conversations with other women about these things and see what they have to say. Send me your thoughts. I'd love to read them!

Look what I did!

2008-07-10T11:50:00.006-06:00

Well, I'm actually getting to work on the house...just like I said I needed and wanted to. I have to admit - I am quite proud of myself for this first task I've accomplished!

At the back of my house, I have a lovely sunroom. Really, it is a greenhouse attached to the house. It has windows that only open partway, a ceiling full of skylights, and has no insulation. Only problem with this is that in the summer it is like an oven...and all that heat soaks into the rest of my house. You see, the doors between the sunroom and the kitchen are interior quality French doors - quite pretty, but very little insulative value. What did I do? I bought a very inexpensive quilt ($6.00) at a discount store, cut it into curtains and hung myself 2 insulated curtains. I think they are quite pretty, and they're making about a 15' difference in my kitchen on hot summer afternoons! Yeah, me! On to my next project. ;-)

And...they're off!

2008-07-05T22:07:00.004-06:00

The names roll off my tongue...Eddy Merckx, Bernard Hinault, Greg LeMond, Jan Ulrich, and yes, Lance Armstrong. The 2008 Tour de France started today - 23 days, 4 mountain finishes, 2,175 miles of road before them. This will once again be a feat of almost unimaginable pain, sacrifice, challenge, pride, sweat, tears, teamwork, comradeship, joy and beauty.

Cycling and the Tour de France comes to the world's stage every July to capture my heart and imagination as I watch these men journey across France on their two-wheeled steeds. I cannot explain why I love it; I can only assert that I truly do. There is something beautiful in the symmetry of the sport...

...the round wheels turning

...the legs and feet moving in circles

...the cyclists riding in one group, snaking around mountain passes

...their rounded backs

...their legs pumping, the picture of perfect movement...

I admire them, I'm amazed by them, I defend them. For me, this is one of the best parts of summer - the early mornings watching the Tour de France. They're off and I'm thrilled!

Happy 5th of July!

2008-07-05T09:43:00.003-06:00

Well, I'm not usually one to get all patriotic on the 4th of July - having grown up in Indonesia and thus having divided loyalties...however...

Last night we went to the Air Force Academy to see the fireworks. That was just a little different from watching them at some park. Being there on a military installation, hearing the newly initiated first-year cadets (called Dooleys) chanting in the background, seeing the Academy's buildings, thinking about what these young men and women have signed themselves up for...that made all those "rockets' red glare" have just a little more meaning to me.

I must say, I am very thankful to live in this country, even at "this time." People are complaining about the economy - why? We can all still afford our cars, eating out every so often, going on even a little vacation, our nice clothes. Are we struggling to put food on the table? Actually, very few Americans are. We're struggling to not fill our closets with shoes.(Yes, I know there are some exceptions to these statements. I am speaking in generalities here!) People are complaining about gas prices - why? We still drive where ever we want, aren't trying all that hard to save on gas. Are we riding to the grocery store that's 2 miles away? Are we walking to the post office? Not many of us. People are complaining about the government - why? We still live in the most free nation on earth where we can criticize to our heart's content, praise when it suits us, vote for our leaders, have a say in at least a little sense.

OK, so some say I shouldn't speak out too loudly on a blog - I might alienate some readers. Others say that is the point of a blog - stir things up! Well, I hope I don't alienate any of you. Just take my opinions with a grain of salt and, if you want, tell me what you think, too. That's the beauty of the U.S. - we can ALL say what we think...and I'll still like you even if we disagree! Have a great weekend!

Beautiful world

2008-07-03T08:57:00.004-06:00

I don't think I can write, think, sing, pray, talk enough about the beauty of this world!

Last night a hard rain in the late afternoon cooled things off considerably, and we awoke this morning to a clear blue sky, cool air, and the prospect of an extraordinary July day. 9:00 a.m and it's only 62'. The city maintains a green that is unusual for this time of year, thanks to our cool summer thus far. Yes, the weeds are flourishing, too, but it is all so lovely that I just can't seem to find a reason to care! Music about my good God pours from my stereo, I wash dishes, I look out the window and have to smile at the leaves twisting in the faint breeze, shining against the sky like tiny pieces of stained glass.

Life is hard. We all agree on that. There are more challenges than any of us would like, more hard times, more sorrow, more struggle. But on a day like today, it all seems to fall into place and the hard stuff, albeit still present, is pushed to the side for just a few moments and I can look at the beautiful world with a clear heart, clear vision, and a strong sense of the good and benevolent.

Summer days

2008-07-02T16:57:00.004-06:00

Got up early and went to the zoo - busy with kids, lots of sunshine, the water fans going full blast. We laughed at the giraffes, hippos and orangutans. Lots of fun! Then this afternoon, just when it was getting good and hot, a heavy rain came in, within about 30 minutes cooling it from 91 to 72. Yeah for Colorado! Summer here is the best in the country - hot in the morning, cool rain in the afternoon. Can't beat that!

Still dreaming

2008-07-02T07:58:00.004-06:00

Well, I dreamt again last night about my stolen wedding rings. It's been 9 months, and I'm still missing those rings. I guess that only makes sense as I'd been wearing them for 17 years. I wish my heart didn't still hurt, and tears didn't still come into my eyes thinking about them. They were, after all, pieces of gold and diamond. I've said it all before, so I won't repeat myself about how much they meant, etc. Truth be told, I'm still hurting, and I still hope I'll find them.

I dreamt that they were not in fact stolen - that one of my cats had played with them and knocked them from my bedside table onto the floor, then scooted them under my bed. What did I do when I first woke up? I moved that bed! Were they there? No. Didn't think so, but it was worth a try. (No, this wasn't the first time I'd looked under the bed. I just thought maybe I'd missed them.)

Oh well, I'll get on with my day, put on my new ring, and remember that it means all the same things the original ones did. The rings are different - how much we love each other, even how we love each other, hasn't changed at all.

Home is where the dishes are...

2008-06-29T15:02:00.003-06:00

Last night I spent a lovely evening with a good friend. We had a short discussion about contentment, and how hard it is for us to be content with what we have. This is a particular challenge for me. I do strive to be content, but I find myself becoming bogged down with frustration over my house - instead of taking steps to change my environment, I feel overwhelmed by the tasks at hand and seem to make little to no progress.

Even though I very much like my home, I don't love it as I did my last one. Granted, my last house was about twice as big as this one and was appointed with some very nice features - a beautiful, lush garden that I planned and planted, a huge kitchen that facilitated friends sitting and talking while I cooked, a living room that could comfortably accommodate a night of friends over for a movie. This house, although it has more historical charm than my 1980s cookie-cutter Cape Cod, doesn't quite have my stamp on it yet. What is it I need to do to fall in love with my current "here"?

I think I need to spend some time getting this place organized to my liking. Because I haven't ever made space for my kind of productive activities (other than in the kitchen), I seem to have a hard time tackling some of my favorite projects - sewing, making stationary, etc. That has got to be a first step to getting myself feeling lovely here. The yard is another sore point, but one I am getting a great start on this summer.

I think, too, in order to feel really comfortable here, I need to do some culling of my life. How many of us are saying the same thing right now? Boy, don't most of us have too much stuff?! Don't get me wrong, I like my stuff - I love most of it! After all, I've spent years accumulating it. Doesn't mean I don't have too much of it. I've gotten a good start on this by getting rid of a good many clothes this spring. I'll continue that trend as summer progresses and I over and over again choose anything over that shirt, those pants. ;-)

With these long, sunny days, hot afternoons, and cool evenings, I should be able to make some good progress on all this. Maybe by this fall, when asked, I can say, "Yes! I love my house!"

Back in the saddle

2008-06-26T19:33:00.005-06:00

There I was, back at the library, manning those familiar help desks, answering all the same questions. Subbing is wonderful! ...for lots of reasons...

1) It was great seeing old co-workers and getting to know new ones

2) Fun getting all the scoop and poop of library happenings

3) Feels good to be useful

4) Felt very good to go home knowing I didn't have to return the very next day! ;-)

Now I'm back home, feeling fulfilled, useful, needed, appreciated. What a great day! The only bummer is that the 8 jars of strawberry-lemon marmalade I made this morning didn't set. I'll give them 24 hours and see what they look like tomorrow. If they don't jell, I'll have to try to find a solution. Any suggestions?

Yeah!

2008-06-23T22:58:00.009-06:00

Tim got home tonight - yeah for me! It is always so wonderful to welcome him home from a camping trip. I love the fire-smoke smell in his clothes and hair, his slightly sunburned nose, his stories of tromping up and down the mountains. I love his anecdotes of the guys with whom he camped, what the weather was like, and how hard the climbs were. Oh, I guess I just love him! Surprise, surprise! ;-)

My purpose

2008-06-22T14:33:00.003-06:00

I heard a great message in church today about God's purpose vs. our purpose for our lives. I've made all these plans of things I want to do. I'm pretty sure my current plans are OK with God - pretty sure he has no problem with me sewing an insulated curtain for my sunroom door! ;-) Yet the question remains, "Are my purposes in line with his purposes?" In other words, even though my plan to sew this curtain is fine, totally non-controversial, am I being sensitive to the big picture as I plan my time, say yes and no to people, interact with friends, etc.? Or am I so set on what I want to accomplish that I don't take the time and energy to see if there is something God wants me to do I'm missing out on?

I know my own answer to this question, so I throw it out there into the void. Maybe you don't believe in God at all, or you don't believe he cares enough about you to have a purpose for your life. I believe he does care about me. In fact, I take him utterly at his word. A verse in Jeremiah (Old Testament) says, "For I know what I have planned for you...I have plans to prosper you, not to harm you. I have plans to give you a future filled with hope."

Trusting in this God, this one who cares enough about me, little old me, to make good plans for me is a balm in my life. How could I live each day without the knowledge of his love? I'm not preaching - just basking in the most basic and foundational truth in my life. Just enjoying the sunshine on my soul. Hope you can find some sunshine today!

Lovely

2008-06-20T00:32:00.002-06:00

Ah, sweet success! I had a slumber party at my house for a friend's birthday! It was jolly fun! My hubby is out of town, so it was perfect timing. We ate dinner (delicious if I say so myself), drank Italian sodas, played games, ate decadent dessert, and watched a movie. All wonderful fun! It was great spending time with these women. It felt so good to have no time limit, no restrictions on what we did, just hanging out, laughing, enjoying one another.

I highly recommend a slumber party to any of you middle aged women out there. It will take years off your spirit!

Sunny skies

2008-06-17T10:16:00.002-06:00

Well, here I am trying to figure out how to spend my days. I know I've only been home 2 days this go-round, but I can't see to focus or get myself organized. I'm piddling. I've unpacked (a good start), planned menus for the next week or so and grocery shopped (healthy eating is high on the priority list), and am picking up just a little bit. I hope to get started on my yard and make good progress this weekend. You should see my plant list! I'm going to need to whittle that down just a little. ;-) Today is sunny and lovely, even though I thoroughly enjoyed yesterday's rain. Feels good getting started and love just being home!

Home again

2008-06-16T07:19:00.002-06:00

Back home, this time to stay...at least for a couple of months. OK, so I have a quick, 2 day trip in July, but other than that, I plan on being here (maybe an occasional night in the mountains). Even though all my trips were fun, I'm worn out and ready to just be here. I'm ready to do all the things I quit my job to do. I'm very much looking forward to getting into a routine and returning to my life of domesticity. I'll bet that sounds pretty boring to a lot of you, but it is just right for me. Don't get me wrong - being a hausfrau doesn't mean I turn off my mind. I won't list all my activities here; believe me, I live a busy, fulfilling life. Sound like I'm trying to convince myself? I'm not. I'm just happy and excited to be getting back to all this! ;-)

First thing to do today is make a list of my projects and prioritize them. A bonus for my spirit is that it is cloudy and possibly rainy today. Most people wouldn't like that, but having grown up in the tropics and now living in a high, arid climate, I miss rain! Today will be a balm to my spirit in many ways.

Welcome home to me!

Finally

2008-06-05T06:52:00.002-06:00

A great personal triumph yesterday! I actually found more than one pair of shorts at the stores that fits and looks good. I have been looking all spring to no avail, and finally succeeded. Yeah! I even found a couple on sale. It's not that I don't have any shorts, but most of mine are either very old and faded or a size and 1/2 too big. (I lost some weight a few years ago.) Now I have some my size that look good. I was very happy.

Quiet spring days here in Colorado. Today is cloudy and rainy - quite lovely in my opinion. I love weather like this. A good day to do a little housework, watch some French Open tennis, and read a good book. Maybe even nap. ;-)

Being home

2008-06-02T12:50:00.003-06:00

On the one hand, the summer seems to be flying by, but I guess it is actually spring that I missed. I've been home a month now, and am getting ready for another trip - a short one this time. We're off to a family reunion in Oklahoma. I'm very thankful that it isn't in July as it will be at least a little cooler than in another month. This should be a good time - my husband's family is fun, lots of laughs, and wonderful people to catch-up with.

Other than that, I'm trying to get my feet back under me - get my house under control (a battle for me), pack for the trip, catch up with friends, keep family happy, etc. I hope to get a lot done in the house this week - cleaning, laundry, and maybe one project. I'm distracted by the French Open though. I do love tennis! Tomorrow I'm going to the zoo with some friends, and that should be fun, too.

Not much else going on. I'm missing Jordan and those there I love quite a bit. Just a month there really got under my skin. I just fell in love! I've enjoyed the little time I've spent with my sister and nephew who live here, though, and that has made it all right not seeing my loved ones across the sea.

It feels a little weird to just be doing ordinary things, but it also feels really good. I just wish I could get motivated to get more done in a day. I feel very tired and would like to just sleep all day. Might be time to get my thyroid meds checked again. ;-)

I hope to have some more pictures up this week, so check back in a day or two.

Too cute

2008-05-28T09:28:00.009-06:00

And did I mention that my sister has 2 cats, who she and the kids love? Not that they were the highlight of the trip, but I do love kitties!! They are both girls; the gray, striped one is Filfila (pepper in Arabic) and the spotty one is Spot. They are great with the kids! The cats have little beds and are fed on the window sill of the kitchen window. These two cuties sit there much of the day, sleeping, looking longingly in the windows. Wicked Spot has torn most of the screens in the house, and they've figured out how to open the windows if they're not locked. One evening, my sister and I returned home quite late and as we opened the front door, Spot went running out of the house! We were quite surprised, and laughed to find her inside. I went into my room to change into comfy clothes and who was sleeping on my bed? Filfila! We shooed her out and settled down to watch a little TV. After a while we got ready for bed. As we were brushing our teeth, who came striding proudly into the bathroom, rubbing on the door frame, the sink, looking so pleased with herself? Why, Filfila again!

"How did she get in?" we were asking ourselves. We walked from room to room checking to make sure all the windows were closed. I had never opened mine, so we didn't go in there until we'd seen that all the other windows were already closed. Sure enough, the previous guest hadn't locked the window, and those little guys had opened it for themselves.

As the days got hotter, I started sleeping with my window open, and little Filfila got a few comfy nights with me. One day, even after I'd tried to repair the screen, the kids came in to wake me up from a nap and there she was again! Very cute, but naughty. ;-)

Back to the spa

2008-05-27T14:26:00.018-06:00

I never got pictures posted of our day at the Dead Sea Spa, so here are some of those. The kids had a great time, and we enjoyed it too. The day was quite cloudy and overcast, but it was wondrous fun anyway. Those kids could swim all day long! This is one of their very favorite places to go for the day as a family. It is about an hour from Amman, so easy to get to in one day. They occasionally stay overnight, but the hotels are very expensive.

Above 2 pics - Hannah loves to go on the big slide, but only with Daddy's help. ;-)

The boys' favorite big slide! David and Joshua are kids #2 and 3 respectively from the front.

2 of the 5 pools we enjoyed.

Joshua relaxing after lunch.

David on his favorite slide.

People really do smear the Dead Sea mud all over themselves - free spa! I didn't do that, but did float in the weird, slimy, very salinated water!

I don't know about you, but I thought this highway sign was hilarious! What is its purpose? Who knows, but check out the guy - I mean, that is some salty water!

A great day was had by all!

Back in the saddle

2008-05-27T14:16:00.002-06:00

Frankly, getting "back in the saddle" isn't going very well as you might be able to tell by the dearth of posts! They say Colorado is headache country, and I think I might be evidence of that. After being away for 5 weeks, I've returned to an abundance of migraines. Is it my squishy pillow? Is it something else in my life (Tim says stress)? Or is it indeed that where I live is terrible for headaches? There have been a few studies published recently about just that thing. The theory is that the combination of high altitude living (over 6,000 ft.), dry weather, and unusually quickly changing weather because of the mountains is a recipe for headache disaster. I tend to doubt Tim's stress theory as I live a fairly stress-free life...at least comparably. I don't have to work, I get to plan my days as I see fit, I have few demands on me. Well, whatever the reason, I'm doing my best to get on with it. Seems like every day I plan on doing much, in or out of the house, I get nailed to the bed with a nasty.

Let's see if some additional exercise and good eating can make a difference. I'll try to write more about my trip, too. I'll also try to not complain, but it is a bummer! Meanwhile, the spring weather here in Colorado is lovely with just sprinklings of rain, cool days, even cooler nights, and the flowers going gangbusters! It is wonderful! I bought a sewing table and hope to get some projects accomplished this summer. Tim and I made a rough landscaping plan for our yard (which is currently bare). My bikes are cleaned, tuned, and ready to go. I have good hiking partners. I even have some menus and grocery lists made. Sounds like a rip-roaring good summer is on the way! Now if my body will only cooperate, I'll get busy. :-)

Sunny day

2008-05-24T09:28:00.002-06:00

I know, I know. I keep saying I'm going to write more, and then don't! Maybe I'll get around to that this weekend. I tell you, since coming back I feel so lazy! I just want to read, lay around, watch TV. I've done hardly any housework, but I'm getting a little bit done. I've caught up with some friends, but not very many. I just feel so tired! Is this normal? I think it is. It's been a long time since I've taken such a long trip, much less overseas, or been that sick for that matter. I hope to turn things around this weekend.

Meanwhile, life is just fine here. ;-) Tim and I had a nice date this week, I went to the zoo with my sister, brother-in-law and nephew, and today is a lovely, sunny Saturday. We have a few errands to run, and maybe we'll have a picnic. All together wonderful!

Oh, the yellow rose of Texas...

2008-05-18T21:01:00.002-06:00

Greetings from Odessa, TX! Not much to see here but two beautiful girls - my sister and her daughter. I've had a great visit here with these two lovelies and my brother, and tomorrow we head home. I'm almost totally well, despite traveling again, and for that I am very thankful! It will feel lovely to be home for a while and am planning on no trips until June. I know that's not all that far away, but I'm going to pretend it is. I plan on going home and doing nothing much other than working on getting my life a little more organized, spending time with friends and family, and getting started on my summer garden. Things other than that will have to wait until June.

It is as hot here as one would imagine, but I know the summer will get even more miserable. I am very thankful for our Colorado climate! Summer there is hot enough for me - TX would wear me out! Nighty, night!

Feeling better

2008-05-14T10:14:00.002-06:00

Wow, have I been a slacker! I went to my Dr. Monday morning after getting home very early (VERY EARLY) Sunday a.m. He confirmed that I had a bad case of bronchitis and a sinus infection. He gave me a very strong, narcotic cough medicine to help me get some sleep. It is my understanding that it actually turns off the coughing reflex in the brain. Well, this stuff worked! I slept almost straight through Tuesday through Friday. I woke up for most meals, but slept, slept, slept. Each day I felt a little better, and I couldn't believe I kept falling asleep. Probably a combination of the medicine, being sick, and just being tired. Amazing!

Now it's Wednesday, I've been home just over a week, and I'm getting ready to go to TX to visit one of my other sisters. I know, I'm crazy to go on another trip so soon, but this one will be very short. When I come back, I promise to resume adding pictures and telling more about my Jordan trip.

In the past few days I've gotten caught up on laundry, unpacked, started preparing meals again (Tim took very good care of me while I was sleeping!), and getting back to life. Feels good. ;-)

Just a word about my trip...it was an amazing journey! I felt God's presence so constantly. He looked after me, that's for sure. The time with my sister and her family was incredible. I feel so embedded with them now. I do miss them quite a bit - especially my sister! Everything I saw of Jordan was wondrous. I knew it would be beautiful, but I just didn't know how beautiful! And all the time I spent with Jordanians, in various celebrations, was great. Words won't really do justice to this trip, but I'll do my best. I'll sign off for now. I'll be back Monday!

Home!

2008-05-04T01:35:00.002-06:00

It's 1:35 a.m., I've been awake almost 22 hours (I'm being generous by crediting myself with about 6 hours of fitful sleep on planes), but I'm here! My wonderful husband showed up at the airport with beautiful flowers and had borrowed his dad's Mercedes convertible in which to drive me home. Didn't I feel like the queen? And what did I walk into? A clean house - no dirty dishes or laundry AND a newly installed gas stove AND a new garbage disposal. I was floored! I'm off to bed and will resume telling stories tomorrow...or the next day. ;-) Sleep!!!

Homeward bound

2008-05-02T22:21:00.002-06:00

Well, the antibiotics are already working, and for that I'm very thankful! In fact, I woke up yesterday morning feeling markedly better than when I went to bed. It was a double blessing, because yesterday held two events I wouldn't have wanted to miss - a wedding, and an invitation to dinner in a wonderful woman's home. I was able to not only participate in both events, but thoroughly enjoy them both. I'll write details when I get home.

I'm in my last few hours here. I'm very sad to be leaving my sister and her family, but very glad to be going home. Weird, isn't it, how our minds and hearts work? The kids are very tired today, dragging as they get ready for school. We kept them out late last night. Visiting in Jordanian homes is seldom a short affair. They'll make it, though. I am lucky - all I have to do is fly. I can sleep on the plane! I'm still stopped up and coughing some, but so much better. I do have some odd stereo thing happening in my ears which I hope doesn't bode ill in terms of pain when I fly, but I'm not in charge of those details, so I won't sweat it.

What can I say about my time here? There aren't really adequate adjectives to express it all, so I'll just work on it as I go along. More from the other side of the ocean, on another day...

Not too great

2008-05-01T12:14:00.001-06:00

Sorry I haven't been posting pics and writing. I've been hit with the leftovers of the cold I left home with. It seems to have turned rather nasty and is sapping all my energy. I started on antibiotics today, though, so hope to be on the mend very soon. When I get home I will sleep, sleep, sleep. I'll keep writing about my trip and posting pics after I get home.

My time here has been wonderful! This has been a precious month with my sister and her family. We've all had a good time, and I will be very sad to leave them! I'll be glad to get home, though, where Tim can take care of me and I can get some much-needed rest. There's too much to see and do here to rest well. Besides, I just can't resist those smiling kids and how much they want to play, talk, read, have fun.

I'll be home late this week. More after that.

Joy!

2008-04-28T01:10:00.002-06:00

Monday morning is here...and I am still in Amman! Yeah! Last week we found out that the kids have all of this week off for Easter break and I got a great deal on changing my ticket. The story is a little more complicated than that, but the lovely result is that I'll be here all week. My hubby was a little sad that I wasn't coming home, but he's very excited that I get this extra time.

Yesterday was the celebration of Easter in this part of the world - they follow the Orthodox calendar. We had some friends over for an extravagent potluck meal that was a wonderful time! We had an egg hunt for the kids, ate too much food, and finished with lovely desserts. A great day for many reasons!

We don't have much planned for this coming week, so I'll put up some misc. pictures I've taken and that I've gotten from my sister. We hope to do one, maybe two, small excursions, so we'll see how our time goes. I got all my shopping done last week, so this week can just be time together with my sister and with the kids.

I'm very happy! Also, my cold/sinus infection/whatever is finally clearing up! I've been sick since April 3 or 4, so this has been a long haul. I haven't ever been too sick, though, so that's been a blessing. I'll work on miscellaneous pictures today. Missing all of you!

Just another Friday

2008-04-25T11:09:00.003-06:00

My sister and I have continued to have a great time! Her husband took care of the kids after school one day this week so we could power shop, and did we ever have fun! It was like years ago when we were both single. Lovely! I do love her kids, and her husband (as well as mine), but I do suppose as her kids get older we'll get more and more time like that - just the two of us doing stuff we used to do. ;-)

Today - the first day of their weekend - started off quite normally. Dad made pancakes (a great whole wheat recipe my sister uses) and we headed off to t-ball. After that our adventures started. We headed to the Dead Sea Spa on the Jordan side of the Dead Sea. This is a fancy hotel that sells admission by the day if you're not staying there. This is the kids' favorite place to go for a day of fun. It is about 45 minutes from my sister's house, so just a short jaunt. Boy howdy, I can see why the kids love this place. OK, it is an amazing location for the adults - right on the Dead Sea beach, a wonderful view of Israel (if it isn't VERY hazy like it was today), a nice snack bar, etc. But for the kids...4 fun pools to swim in, 2 water slides, and a kiddie pool with a playground right in the middle of it. We had a wonderful time swimming, playing, diving, doing all the fun things you do at the pool. We ordered lunch poolside and just chilled. A very fun day to spend with my niece and nephews.

Unfortunately, the day didn't end great. Within 15 minutes of being home, one kid has a fever and another kid has thrown up. Well, so much for all going smoothly. Nevertheless, a fun day and a great memory (hopefully) for all of us.

I head home on Monday and am feeling quite sad about that tonight. I think next time I come, I'll come for several months and just move in. My sister said that would be all right so, in a few years after I've saved up enough for another trip, I just think I will. ;-) I'll wrap things up this weekend, and keep you all up to date. Thank for all your comments! xo C

Wadi Rum - our 2nd day there

2008-04-23T03:17:00.025-06:00

Our night having passed peacefully, the moon watching over us
all the while, we awoke to an amazing day! I was the first awake in camp (having been awake most of the night - that delicious tea!). Joshua was the next to wake. He sat up in his sleeping bag and stretched, looking around to see if there were any other eyes open. I smiled at him and he smiled back, sleepily, remembering his mother's admonition of the night before to be very quiet unless the sky was very bright in the sky. That was definately not the case - the sun was barely up. It was only about 6:20 a.m. Joshua asked me if he could have a sesame seed biscuit from the night before and I said yes. He took one from the bag and left the camp enclosure to go play quietly on the sand dunes. I decided I'd had enough of my sleeping bag, too, and followed him out there. The sand was so cold! I was surprised by that. It was wonderful watching the sun finish its rising standing on the top of the sand dune in the nearly complete silence!

The morning proceeded quietly enough. One by one we all awakened, and eventually ate our simple breakfast of boiled eggs and pita bread with "triangle" cheese and jam. (Triangle cheese is a processed, spreadable cheese very common in Europe and the Middle East, usually eaten at the morning meal.) Ali, our host's son and overnight guard awakened and made us fresh tea, then headed back to Rum for the morning.

How happy we all were to see the day come! It meant climbing, hiking, playing and exploring our immediate area. We found 2 fairly recently eaten sheep, a goat's hind leg, lots of desert beetles, and lots of giant rocks to climb. My sister's boys (Joshua and David) are fearless climbers, and they made us all a little nervous as they scampered up rocks to heights of 30 ft. or more! They needed help a time or two descending, but all was well.

In the late morning, before it got too hot, we all went for a walk. The kids didn't want to go very far, but I walked a ways down some 4x4 tracks that led east of our camp. I followed them to the top of a hill (read "sand dune") that afforded an amazing view of Wadi Rum - more than we could see from our camp which was in a slight valley. I had only taken my SLR (actual film) camera on this walk, so I have no pictures of that wonderful view to post. :-( I was surpised by how much vegetation there is - lots of little bushes and tiny flowers springing right out of the sand. The bushes lose most of the their color by late spring, but there is always at least a little green, I'm told. Surprising, yes?

The rest of the day was occupied with more of the same - climbing, playing in the sand, reading in the shade, drinking LOTS of water!

Our camp under the overhang of this huge rock!

The great dune just outside our camp. The pinker sand is loose, just as one would expect it to be. The lighter sand is totally dry and very hard-packed.

David and Joshua playing on our dune...

David's artwork - drawn with a light-colored rock. He had just learned the phrase "artist's canvas" and used it to describe his work.

On our walk...

I know I don't have great pics of Wadi Rum, so if you want to look at way better pictures than mine, here is at least one website...

http://www.trekearth.com/gallery/Middle_East/Jordan/South/Aqaba/Wadi_Rum/

Night in the desert

2008-04-22T00:10:00.002-06:00

a tall kerosene lamp stands guard over us
rugs laid out under the overhanging rock
strong, sweet tea to welcome us
portions bigger than any of us can eat
camels trodding past
moon, rocks, sand, stars
absolute silence

the beautiful children
my sister's voice lilting on with a bedtime story
Hannah tiptoeing in her pink footed pajamas

the moon coming over the rocks
quieting down for bed
clean face and feet

to sleep in a Bedouin camp
we dream of Arabia
no longer mysterious to our children

Wadi Rum - our Bedouin camp (Friday and Saturday)

2008-04-21T09:07:00.041-06:00

Warning: long entry!!

We arrived at our guide's camp around 6:00 p.m. After our bumpy ride through the desert (Toyota truck pictured), it was lovely to be on solid ground again. :-)

Before getting into the nuts and bolts of our camp, let me say this...

When we walked into our camp's enclosure, tears came into my eyes and I could hardly contain myself. It was so beautiful, so amazing, so wondrous to be in a real Bedouin camp, to see the colorful mats and rugs, the teapot, the satchel hanging from a rock. I was overwhelmed by the experience, and it had just begun. I felt so privileged to be in that place and to be seeing all my eyes could take in. I can't really describe what I was feeling, but it was an amazing moment of authenticity, of wonder, and of awe at this world of great variety in which we live.

These Bedouin guides maintain semi-permanent camps at the sites that are traditionally their families' camps. Our guide told us that in the past, the Bedouin had tamed much of Wadi Rum. They'd once established water reservoirs, figured out irrigation systems, grown wheat and vegetables. This is no longer true; in fact, very few Bedouin in the Wadi Rum area still survive via their traditional methods of grazing goats and camels, etc. Most now use the tourism in Wadi Rum as their means of support. These camps stay up most of the year, and still look much the same as they always have. We got off the truck and started hauling our stuff into the tent area. The entrance to this semi-enclosed area is just to the right of the tent you see in the first picture, between the tent and the rock.

The following pictures try to give you a sort of 360' view of our camp's area, with the entrance at the south end of the camp. The tent's door (2nd picture) is barely visible because of the sun glare - just next to the small white table - between the black striped fabric and the tan fabric. The tent's sides can be lifted in the afternoon's hot weather. The tent is very warm at night and stays cool during the day until early afternoon, even in the heat.

The third picture is directly opposite the entrance to the camp. A shelf holding some traditional Bedouin items is pictured on the left, and on the right is a big pile of blankets and thin mattresses - the items traditionally used in (and out of) the tent for sleeping and lounging. We brought our own sleeping bags. As my sister said, "I like to know I'm the only thing sleeping in my sleeping
bag." Get it? Bugs, etc.

The next picture shows the same pile of mattresses and blankets, but also shows where various rugs, etc. are laid out as a seating area. Yes, just like you've seen in the movies, they have no chairs and sit on the ground for meals, entertaining, etc. We slept right where those mattresses on the right side of the picture begin. We took more mattresses from the pile, laid them side by side, and put our sleeping bags on top of them. We could have slept in the tent, but the temperature was perfect for sleeping under the stars.

As you can see in the next picture, the tent faces a rock overhang. This overhang totally protects the camp from the sun until about 11:30 a.m. Even after that, one can sit in the shade close to the rock until about 2:30 p.m. This was a wonderful, beautiful place to sleep, with the rock over part of us, able to look out the the expanse of sky above us.

The next to last picture shows Hannah running into the camp's enclosure. The last picture shows the great sand dune just outside the camp's enclosure. The boys immediately unloaded their toy trucks, climbed the dune and started playing.

OK, so now you can picture where we were staying. After unloading the truck, we got our stuff a little organized, sent the kids off to play, and began relaxing. Soon our guide and his son arrived with the traditional welcome - very strong, very sweet black tea and sesame seed covered cookies. I love that tea and, unfortunately, drank too much and then couldn't sleep, but more on that later. After this traditional Arabic welcome (by the way, it would have been very rude of us to either refuse the tea or not sit down with them to enjoy it), our hosts prepared dinner for us. We didn't have to wait long before that was laid out for us. The traditional meal served to visitors in Wadi Rum is Makloubi - upside down in Arabic. Chicken, eggplant, and cauliflower are placed in a deep pan and covered with rice and broth. After it is all cooked, it is turned out on a large tray and served...in HUGE portions! I was embarrassed at how much I left on my plate. My sister told me this is a part of Bedouin tradition and hospitality - generosity is a cardinal virtue among the Bedouin people. If they served us any less, it might imply they were cheap or unable to provide for us. Our Maklouba was served with a cucumber, tomato, and yogurt salad which I watched others mix into the rice - I did the same. The dinner was delicious!
After dinner, our guide left us, but with a guard. Hospitality being so important to this people group, they wouldn't want their guests to have a need or face any kind of danger without someone there to provide for them. Our guide's teenage son stayed with us. As he heard us winding down, he came into the camp enclosure to get some mattresses and blankets from the pile. After asking if we needed anything at all, he walked a little way from camp, made his bed, and slept there under the stars. He was close enough if we'd needed anything, but plenty far away to give us all the privacy we needed.

It was an amazing night! As I said above, I couldn't sleep much at all because of drinking too much of the wonderful tea. Usually, when I can't sleep I toss and turn and get quite irritated. Not so this night. I was almost content to be awake, lying under the stars. I knew I was going to get to enjoy the moon and stars more than anyone else. Every time I rolled over, awake again, I would smile, seeing the moon crossing the sky. In fact, the moon was almost full, and so we hardly saw any stars. At one point, the moon was so bright that I put a shirt over my eyes to make it darker. Incredible, wonderful!

The highlight of the night was this...upon waking, I sat up and looked around our camp. The moon had risen above the large rock under whose outcropping we were sleeping, and was shining on the tent like a spotlight. Oh, how I wish I was an artist and could render that image in paint or pencil! It was so beautiful! Something about it touched my heart deeply and once again, the tears flowed down my cheeks.

So a fitful night slowly turned into dawn. I watched the sky gradually lighten, the boys wake up one by one, stretching, looking around them with quiet smiles. My sister had told them, "If you wake up and the sky isn't very bright, you must be very quiet!" They obeyed. I followed Joshua out to the sand dune and thus our day began.

Wadi Rum - the drive in (Friday, April 18)

2008-04-20T07:53:00.047-06:00

We were hoping to get a good jump on our afternoon and arrive in
Wadi Rum by 4:00 in order to have time to do a little hiking and playing on Friday, but we left Amman a little later than we intended. We stopped to fill-up with gas and bought delicious falafel sandwiches to take with us. These were the typical falafel as many of us have had, wrapped in fresh pita bread with cabbage, tomatoes, cucumber, pickles, and a tahini sauce. Yummy!

Pic #1: FIRST VIEW OF WADI RUM FROM THE HIGHWAY
Disclaimer - many of these pictures were taken from the car, so they aren't great quality!

By the way, "wadi" means a gully or stream bed that remains dry except in the rain season - so dry most of the time. There are a lot of Wadi this and thats if you look at a map of Jordan. We were headed for the village of Rum which is in a wadi - thus, Wadi Rum.

Pic #2: Getting closer!

Our drive would take us about 4 hours pretty much straight south from Amman, including a potty stop for the kids. It isn't a particularly remarkable drive, but as I love seeing countries from cars, I enjoyed it. The whole drive is through desert. Although Amman has quite a bit of green, it pretty quickly disappears once you get south of the road to the airport. A lot of those trees were evidently planted to look good for visitors arriving - and it does! On our drive, there weren't ever too many miles between villages - probably never more than 20. Almost every village has a sign welcoming you and then saying goodbye. There wasn't much variety in architecture, but that's been true in Amman, too. Sorry no pics of small villages - my camera was in the trunk!

Pic #3: Leaving Rum village (taken from the back of the truck)

After about 3 hours of driving, you climb a long hill, and as you come over that hill you see the Wadi spread out in front of you. It is breathtaking even from a distance! The view of Wadi Rum goes past the horizon, so you can only see a little of it. (See pic 1 above). It is amazing to see these monoliths rising out of the desert. Another 1/2 hour and you take a turn to the east and head toward the Wadi Rum visitors' center. This is a pretty new building with very clean and modern bathrooms - lovely! The area known as Wadi Rum is a national park, environmentally protected (somewhat), with a very small fee by U.S. standards. The drive from the highway to the center is about 20 minutes. We called our guide on the phone and he told us where to meet him in the village of Rum where he lives.

SIDEBAR: I'll tell you how this guide thing works if you live in Jordan or know someone who does when you get the privilege of visiting.... A large percentage of the Bedouins who used to live in Wadi Rum and still populate the area now survive off the tourism

industry. They drive jeeps in and out of the wadi, take people to their families' permanent camps, and act as hosts, caterers and tour guides. An amazing and adaptable group of people. My sister and her husband have a favorite guide they've used many times. They are quite comfortable in their relationship with him, trust him absolutely, and very much appreciate his excellent service. We gave him a call, told him when we wanted to come, what meals we wanted him to provide, and that was that...almost. A slight glitch in this expedition: their usual guide was full the night we wanted to stay (with a group of 20!), but his brother's camp was available.

OK, so we stopped at the visitors' center, paid our fee, headed on

to Rum and met up with our guide. Although my sister had never met him before, she recognized him right away - he looks just like his brother! He loaded our stuff into the back of his 4x4 Toyota truck, we all piled in on top of our stuff, and we headed out to camp - about a 20 min. drive.

I couldn't really imagine what camp was going to look like. I had a hard time picturing what the terrain was going to turn into. I couldn't believe all these sandstone giants rising straight out of the desert. Quite a sight to see! The desert is a true desert - dry, bare, nearly devoid of vegetation, beautiful colors of sand, lots of wind. We arrived in the

afternoon (and it is still spring), so it wasn't too hot. The air was

starting to cool and it was just lovely. The jeep ride was a little topsy-turvy for someone who doesn't like feeling out of control in a car. The driver was more than competent, but the feeling of alternately sinking into sand, skidding on sand, and bumping along on very hard-packed sand was a little crazy! We very quickly lost sight of the village and headed out into the wadi where we saw very few other people. We passed a few other camps, and so I began to get an idea of where we were headed and what it would look like. We did pass a man on a camel with his small camel herd. I wish I had asked our driver (our Bedouin host's eldest son) to stop so I could take some good pictures, but I'm hoping to get more pics from my sister since she has seen so much more of

Jordan than I have. It was quite a sight! I can't really describe how beautiful this place is. I'm hoping a few of my pictures will ate least be able to convey a little of it. I'll also try to find a few websites that might have better pictures than me.

I'll sign off for now. Tomorrow I'll load pics of our camp and talk about that. xo!

Back in Amman

2008-04-19T11:07:00.002-06:00

Well, we're back from Wadi Rum. It was an AMAZING trip to an almost indescribable place. I am TO TIRED to write much at all, so I'll just say a few things. The landscape is almost impossible to describe, so I hope my pictures do it at least a little justice. The sand, the desert, the huge rocks or mountains - whatever they are - just incredible! We're home now and tomorrow I will post pictures and tell what we did. Lots of fun. A wondrous memory we created.

Staying at home

2008-04-16T04:12:00.003-06:00

Hi, again, from Amman, Jordan. My goodness, didn't my sister and I wear ourselves out yesterday in the heat! Last evening, when it turned cool, we went to one of my sister's favorite Arabic restaurants. It is located in a village just outside Amman. The drive there, and home, afforded beautiful views of the countryside. On the way home, we saw one of the very large mosques all lit up - so beautiful! The restaurant is in an old house - beautiful stonework, an enclosed garden eating area, and an eating area on the roof. My sister ordered all her favorites for me and we had way more than we could eat, but it was wonderful tasting so many different things. Our amazing meal began with little bowls of hummus, baba ganoush, muhammara (a spicy dip made from peppers, tomatoes, crushed walnuts, etc.), and a salad called fattoush (lettuce, tomato, cucumber, small pieces of fried pita bread and parsley in a lemon and garlic salad dressing. Of course, all of this and the following dishes are served with pita bread, often made to order. Our main course was lemon and garlic marinated grilled chicken, an eggplant casserole made with bread, yogurt, and other yummy things, and a kidney bean and sauce dish. Oh, everything was just too good!

Today we're just hanging out - doing laundry, playing with Hannah (3 yrs. old), taking the boys to school, picking them up. Just a quiet day at home. I'm still getting over this cold which has taken another turn for the worse. I've had a low-grade fever for a couple of days, and so today I'm just going to rest.

We had a lovely time on the front veranda this morning, watching the turtles, petting the cats, watching Hannah run and play. Such energy! My sister and I ate watermelon and just chilled. I'm sure I'll feel better tomorrow. Our trip to Wadi Rum has been postponed a day, giving my body an additional day to get even better. I plan on a long nap, a quiet evening, and a similar day tomorrow!