Mystery nephew

I have been informed, and concur, that I have been terribly remiss in putting up at least one picture of my new nephew - Ethan. He was born about 4 weeks ago, and so far is giving his mom and dad quite a bit of trouble - constipation, upset stomach, lots of screaming and crying. This does not, however, seem to have deterred them from loving him! Imagine that!! So, here's my first picture of Ethan. I'll work at getting some more up as he is, indeed, almost as cute as his older brother, Zachary. 

My buddy

Can you believe these beautiful, blue eyes? This is what I get to look into each time I spend time with my precious nephew Zachary. I have 5 other nieces and nephews who live far away from me, so I am even more thankful to have 2 living here in the same city. I think I'm in love!!

Crazy...

...that's what last week was! I took care of Zachary for 2 days, helped my sister with 2, and then Friday was spent with some wonderful lady friends. ;-) A good week, but totally exhausting. I'm processing the whole baby/no baby thing, and that's good. Meanwhile, my house seemed to explode even though I was hardly here (because I was hardly here?). 

What does this week hold? Very little...except catching-up on my house. That means laundry, dishes, sweeping, dusting, etc. I'll get a lot done, and hopefully some praying while I do it. I want to spend more time on my relationship with my God! He sustains me and loves me; I want to seek him out.

I know, still no pictures of Boston...maybe later this week! Back to my full laundry baskets for now.

Whoa!

How fast does time pass? I mean to tell you, it seems like I've been home just a few days, but tonight it will have been a week. I still haven't unpacked. I have called a lot of my friends and even seen some of them. I also made it to the grocery store. I keep saying I'll download my pictures, and maybe I'll get that today.

But, frankly, I have bigger fish to fry.

My sister and her husband (not the ones in Jordan) are about to have their second baby. They will be going to Denver tomorrow morning, so I'll be taking care of my nephew Zachary for two days. I'm excited about this time with him, but a little nervous too. I must confess that, even though I LOVE spending time with this little guy, being alone with him often brings on the tears. Being alone with him feels too close to what I want - a child of my own! Although I can say with full confidence, and honestly believe, that God is in charge of my life, the timing of events, etc., I still mourn not having a kid. Maybe someday this will work out...

Meanwhile, I've recruited friends to come be with me - just to hang out, play, etc. Tim will come over some, too, and that will be lots of fun.

So, just be patient. I'll get some pics of Vermont and Boston, but not until after I spend my couple of days with little Zachary. (Little? He ways almost 30 lbs.!)

Oh, by the way - I have a name now. He calls me "Nini." I just about die each time I hear it!!! Could I love him more? I certainly doubt it. I think the appropriate phrase is, "apple of my eye!"

Morning

I had a terrible dream last night. I was back working at the library, and was visiting retirement homes doing PR. I saw Tim's grandfather there - as if I'd forgotten that he was till alive. A terrible feeling, but a wonderful reunion. Can't really explain how awful that felt, but it sure did. I've awakened feeling down, a little shaken. 

I greatly dislike it when I have dreams that are hard to leave behind, that follow me through my morning. At least this one wasn't about my mom - those are the worst. I'll try to just get busy early and get on with my day. AJ has been gone for 13 years this December, so I don't need to worry about finding him somewhere unexpected! We still miss him; I still miss my mom. All those feelings are real. What to do with them today? I'll put them in my pocket and try to scatter them as I walk along the day's path.